On Monday, I went to Pottermore.com for the first time. WHY HAVE I NOT DONE THIS BEFORE?
I received my wand (rowan with a unicorn hair core, 14 1/2 inches, slightly yielding) and was sorted into my house. I’m a Ravenclaw!
I am almost embarrassed by how happy this made me. Like, it felt like J.K. herself met me, and was like “Oh yeah. You’re a Ravenclaw.” which is just like the best thing ever.
Anyway, I guess my thought is: Wit beyond measure is man’s greatest treasure.
I am so behind on my write-ups for my “A Year In Books – 50 States” (which is what I am calling it now because I can’t think of another thing to call it, suggestions welcome), but I’m hoping to catch up in the next couple of weeks.
For Louisiana, I read “Mad Madame Lalaurie” by Victoria Cosner Love and Lorelei Shannon…because I’m very attracted to the macabre (side note – I once knew a guy who pronounced this word “mac-a-bray” even though I corrected him on multiple occasions because he “understood how language works” better than I did.)
Also, I read this book because I’ve been on many a ghost tour in New Orleans and we always stop by this house and I’ve noticed that the stories on the tour are getting progressively more gruesome so I wanted to know the facts. And, if I’m being honest, American Horror Story: Coven may have played a role…..because Kathy Bates y’all
It’s a bit hard to say what I thought about this book. Well researched certainly, however I found the writing a bit choppy and apologist. I definitely appreciated all of the research and attempts to tell the story that the historical documents we have available to us tell, which is definitely different than the ghost tour versions. But, I was uncomfortable with some of the prose, which at times felt like a justification of her actions or an attempt to redeem her reputation. In the end, that isn’t what the authors were attempting to do at all, but it came across that way to me in certain bits of the book.
I wanted to know the story the historical documents had to tell and I got that, but I also got a bit of an apologist vibe which I wasn’t thrilled with. Again, very well researched but this isn’t something I would read again.
My favorite and most successful coping mechanism is re-reading all 7 Harry Potter books.
For Nevada, I read “Area 51: An Uncensored History of America’s Top Secret Military Base” by Annie Jacobsen, and it took me ages because this book is fairly long and just absolutely packed full of information.
I really really enjoyed this book and not only because it put some of my alien fears aside, but also because it was very interesting and you read things in it and you’re like “Whoa. Wait. What?” and then you re-read the same thing over and over until it sinks in that that is a thing that really happened. This is one of those books where you need to let your thoughts process the information a little longer than usual.
After reading this my brain feels full in a really good way. I recommend this if you’re at all interested in Area 51, and really, even if you’re not because this book was kind of mind blowing.
For the first book of my 50 state book resolution, I chose “Roanoke -Solving the Mystery of the Lost Colony” by Lee Miller.
AND IT WAS AWESOME.
Even if you don’t like non-fiction, you would love this book. It reads like a mystery. Probably because it is one, although, after reading this, it’s a bit less of one. I thought this book was outstanding. I couldn’t put it down once I started it and I kept exclaiming things like:
“I can’t believe Fernandez betrayed them!”
“I knew Sir Francis Walsingham would play into this….”
Those poor colonists. They got caught in a web they didn’t weave. Also, poor Captain Thoughtful, because I kept interrupting him from his book to talk about everything that was happening in this book.
If you have an interest in long unsolved mysteries or early American history or English history, or really if you like to read at all, you should read this book. I highly recommend it.
Just kidding, it’s not.
You know that moment in Frankenstein when Dr. Frankenstein felt both proud and horrified at what he had created?
I get that now.
This snowman is the smallest most deformed snowman with an ant corpse in it this world has ever seen. And I am both proud and horrified to be it’s creator.
I have the word “Slammerkin” scribbled on several post-it notes on my desk and in my purse. “Slammerkin” is the subject of 3 drafts in my email. I even have a blog post titled “Slammerkin” in my blog drafts that has been there for over a year. And yet, for the life of me, I couldn’t remember what any of it meant or was supposed to remind me to do. For several minutes, I thought it was a word I had made up and couldn’t remember the definition for (this has happened to me enough time for this to be a pretty reasonable conclusion). Is “Slammerkin” my “Bad Wolf”? (Don’t Dr. Who references make you happy? They make me so happy). BUT what it really is, is a book. A book that I now remember almost everyone I talk to about recommending a book tells me I should read. And yet, I haven’t. But now I will because “Slammerkin”.
Have any of you read it? Thoughts? (On anything really I would happily discuss the Dr. Who reference if you haven’t read Slammerkin).
On my way back from NYC last week, I was flipping through a SkyMall (because frankly, that shit cracks me up), when I found something that would CHANGE MY LIFE.
A Harry Potter magic wand remote control.
Just think of all the spells I could cast! Anytime someone that I didn’t like came on TV, I would be like “Petrificus Totalas!” and it would freeze the screen (pause it). OR, if I was watching a History Channel special on Hitler, I would be like “Avada Kedavra!” and then I would have KILLED HITLER. (aka, turned off the TV).
I need this wand in my life so bad y’all.
You guys, do NOT take The Bloggess’ book “Let’s Pretend This Never Happened” to a graduation ceremony. I am dead serious about this. This might be the best advice I’ve ever given and you should definitely take it to heart.
I know this is good advice, because I did the opposite of it at my cousin’s graduation on Saturday. I took The Bloggess’ book and I read it and I learned an important lesson, which is I should have probably brought a different book to graduation. Maybe one that made me all weepy or introspective of something. What I definitely shouldn’t have done was bring a book that is funny as hell and twice as curse-word laden. And I especially shouldn’t have started reading that book when the President of the University began his speech because while I was trying to stifle my laughter at this exceptionally well written and extraordinarily funny book, the President of the University was talking about struggle, and the Civil Rights movement, and perseverance.
Basically, my laughter made everyone around me think I was a lazy racist. Which, I’m not just for the record. I’m just a girl who chose the wrong moment to start reading a hysterical book written by one of her blogging idols.
Learn from my mistakes friends. Don’t let the world think you’re a lazy racist. Take something a bit more serious to read during your friend’s and family’s graduation ceremonies.
It has become apparent to me that I internalize the fiction I read and love. The thought suddenly struck me when I noticed a wasps nest outside my apartment door and my very first thought was “Shit. I hope those aren’t tracker jackers.” Which, of course, are genetically mutated wasps that are featured in The Hunger Games. This forced me to consider other things I think and do that are clear indications I’m perhaps getting a little too into the books I love.
I always explore (lock myself into) any wardrobe I’ll fit in.
When I’m scared of something, I attempt to cast a Riddikulus spell at it. Please note, this failed miserably against the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.
I think about the things I can carry in my purse that would allow me to survive in desert island situation.
I frequently speak to or at least around trees just in case they turn out to be ents.
I’ve spent a significant amount of time thinking about which class I would most excel in at Hogwarts. (It’s charms)
I would very much like to own a mockingjay pin- just so people know where I stand.
The good news is that I’m quite prepared to live in a dystopian society wherein young wizards are sent into an arena to magically duel to the death but also may get spirited away to a happier, although not always peaceful world, if they stumble into the right furniture or cave and maybe if they make the trees in the arena angry enough they will come to their aid and fight for the good of all mankind. I’m totally prepared for that world.