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I Already Have My Nobel Peace Prize Speech Written. |

April 8, 2013 by
Last Saturday, I found the cure for baby fever.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
The cure for baby fever is going to Ikea on a Saturday. No matter how much you want children when you walk in, you will walk out thanking all of the major deities and many of the minor ones that right at that particular moment, you don’t have children.
I can’t wait to win some major scientific awards for this! Is this a thing they give Nobel Prizes for? Because I may already have my acceptance speech written…
In your face scientific community! That’s what you get for not recognizing the post I wrote about poisonous mutant spiders. Now you all look silly and I look like a genius. Which I am. Because I found a cure for baby fever. At Ikea, which is like the worst place for important scientific thinking ever and yet I still made this discovery. Like a boss. A boss of science.
You’re welcome world.
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