The other day, I was just laying around with my boyfriend (who is a complete dreamboat and not even imaginary) eating SweetTarts because about 75% of my diet is made up of candy. I popped a blue flavored SweetTart into my mouth and promptly managed to start choking on it. Most people say that when you’re about to die, your life flashes before your eyes. That didn’t happen to me but I sort of wish it did because I bet it would be a really funny movie. Instead of recalling bit of my hilarious and happy life, all I could think was “But blue isn’t even my favorite flavor, I can’t die eating a blue SweetTart, that doesn’t even make sense.” And that’s true because purple is my favorite SweetTart flavor and would definitely be my flavor choice in a SweetTart death scenario. That way, at my funeral people could say “Well, at least she died eating her favorite flavored SweetTart.” and I think it would help them with their grieving.
But, I didn’t die eating a blue flavored SweetTart. I managed to dislodge it in less than a second and it’s a good thing too because my boyfriend was about to heimlich the hell out of me. Once I realized I was A-ok, I couldn’t help but laugh uncontrollably for about 5 minutes because how weird would it be to die while eating a blue flavored SweetTart?
My boyfriend didn’t think it was as funny, but that’s probably just because he didn’t know it was a blue SweetTart I choked on.