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I Made A Bad Life Choice When I Decided To Watch Ancient Aliens

November 2, 2012 by
NOT an alien.
So, in an effort to confront some of my more, let’s say, bizarre fears (dinosaurs, aliens, countdown clocks) I decided to watch an episode of “Ancient Aliens” on the History channel. It was a spur of the moment decision. It was a bad life choice. On the bright side, I wasn’t afraid at all and not one thing on the show frightened me. On the dark side (of the moon-bazinga) I was angry for the rest of the day and continually maintained a less than mature argument with people who could not hear me through the TV screen. Because, I’m sorry- you don’t get to say the Loch Ness monster is an alien. You don’t. Nessie is a world treasure and you don’t get to take that away by saying it’s not from this world. No. No. No.
Also, I refuse to believe that minotaurs and centaurs where ancient alien experiments. Why do I refuse to believe that? Because I do. Because I love mythological creatures and you need to stop misappropriating their legacies. I don’t try and tell you that aliens didn’t land in Roswell, do I? No, I don’t because I respect your beliefs. And also your beliefs frighten me so I just stay away from Roswell. (Side note: The one alien thing I’ve ever liked is actually the WB show “Roswell”) But I happen to treasure my mythological creatures and I don’t appreciate you trying to twist them into something that will scare the google out of me.
All I’m really saying is leave Nessie alone. And hey, maybe don’t tell talk about aliens so much, because, again, they scare me.

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